As part of my exploration of existing religions, communities and sacred spaces, I visited a Friends’ Meeting last Sunday at a Quaker church. Several colleagues have suggested I go, and even noted I should go to multiple meetings – their structure is pretty free form, and there’s lot of variety. So what you see on one day may not be representative.

The basic format is this: People gather in the meeting hall, sitting in circle or arc. You come in silently, sit silently.

If you are moved to speak, you speak – usually for a couple minutes – before sitting down in silence again.

That’s it.

The particular meeting I went to, there was silence for the first 50 minutes, ending with one woman standing to speak about her brother, who had been abusing drugs, and the struggle they both had with it. A little afterwards, a few other people stood to announce events being run by the community.

I gather that different congregations – and different meeting times within congregations – vary in how much time is typically spent talking. In this congregation, the early morning Sunday meeting is usually entirely silent. The second service (the one I went to) starts at 11:00, and is typically mostly silence, but usually has more than 1 speaker.

There’s a different-version-of-me, from a different time in my life, that would have been profoundly bored by the experience. “I’m traveling all this way to sit in silence for an hour? I could do that at home. Also, why?” And there’s a different-different-version-of-me that would have found it exactly what I needed – constantly surrounded by the hustle-bustle of New York City, desperately needing a moment of tranquility in a communal setting.

Last Sunday, I found myself appreciating it for what it was, though not something I felt moved to go back to immediately.

Something I noted was that I wasn’t sure exactly what to *do* during the silence. Silence is not inherently boring – it could be a time to silently reflect on something important, or think about your possible choices for the future, or just clear your mind to experience peace and clarity. The lack of direction could be a bug or a feature. If you’re already experienced with multiple forms of meditation or reflection, having the freedom to make of it what you will could be valuable.

I haven’t quite gotten the hang of any form of meditation though, and I’d have preferred a bit more direction. (I could imagine a Quaker who’s been going a while telling me that I’m missing the point).